What The *#&% Is a "GOOD MAN" Anyway?

[MsHeartBeat]

I keep hearing the phrase "good man" bandied about on various web forums, in Black magazines, in chat rooms, churches, and amongst couples period.  I just have to play Devil's Advocate and ask the posters here:

(1) Just what in a man's mind qualifies a male personage as a "good" man? 
(2) And what in a woman's mind qualifies a male personage as a "good" man?

Whose standard of performance are we talking about here?  People seem to have very rigid ideas of what a "quality" man is, and what is not.  I feel that everyone has both cool and not so cool aspects of their personality, lifestyle and thought processes, and what you might think is "good" I might think is stupid.

Who said that everyone has to look for the exact same things in a man anyway to be a woman that is with a "good" man? 

Because I know I am a smart, sassy, intelligent, well-bred, sexy lady.  But I don't go around telling people that I am a "good woman!"  I'd never use such a phrase to describe myself!  EVER.  Yet I hear both men women say it proudly and I always wonder why people sit around thinking they are so great, grand and wonderful that they deserve to have love and devotion from others and that people that aren't "good" should not have such joy in their lives! 

In reality, calling yourself a "good" man or a "good" woman does not make you special nor does it make you any more deserving of love than someone that you may view as not being as "good" as you are.  And just because you may view someone as not being good enough in your eyes does not make them unworthy of the partner whose heart they have captured.

I sometimes sense a superiority complex amongst "good" men... (perhaps based more in defensiveness and confusion than ego, but its there just the same) that are single and alone. I think they're actually angry and frustrated that they've worked so hard to be "good" but aren't reaping the desired benefits.

So I ask again, just what makes someone a "good" man in your eyes? 

[devineone]

So I ask again, just what makes someone a "good" man in your eyes? 

I believe you answered this question nicely in another thread topic Ms. HB.  This to me makes for a good man in my eyes.  A man who handles his business in all the ways that matter.  Somebody like CB seems to be.

Bottom line, women (just like men), want a nice stable romantic guy that she trusts implicitly and who takes care of business in the streets and a thug lovin' give it to me baby freak daddy  in the bedroom.

[Informed Investor]

Good Man: A man who works routinely to improve his mind body and finances. The good man adheres to a code of conduct in accordance with his religious or moral views. He isn’t hard as steel or wishy washy like dye in clothing before the first wash. The good man is strong enough to stand up for what he believes in but flexible enough to consider opposing points of view.

Ex: The good man may wear a suit to work everyday but underneath the suit are the tattoos and muscle set from his youth. In his walk there still remains the swagger of the hustler haha.

[cool breeze]

Ex: The good man may wear a suit to work everyday but underneath the suit are the tattoos and muscle set from his youth. In his walk there still remains the swagger of the hustler haha.

There's gonna be a whole lot of cats that will be wishing they had never gotten tattoos..Especially if they weren't in the NBA or NFL..Those things are a pain to have removed..And as you age, you will not want your body to resemble a wrinkled billboard..

Tatts? Not for me--unless they were temporary and they came up with a way to airbrush them on..

I don't do needles..

[Informed Investor]

CB

Its cool when done in moderation. I only want 3. I have this symbol on my chest http://www.chinatownconnection.com/chinese-symbol-for-tiger.htm  I want a cross (actually a cross leaning sideways inside a crown) on my arm and a royal lion on my other arm.

My last GF used to go crazy over tats. A lot of women lose their damn minds over them. When I got my first one I thought one of the female customers was going to phuck the sh-t out of me on the floor in the tattoo shop LOL.

[MsHeartBeat]

Ohhhh Investor!!!