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By December 2, 2011

Why are men being invited to baby showers?

Dear Ms. HeartBeat:
I went to a baby shower a few weeks ago and was astonished to see not only the father, but a number of other husbands and his friends there too. Since when have been started being invited to BABY SHOWER’s? I am not asking this question to impose my belief that men shouldn’t. But I’d like to know if you can explain what a baby shower represents and if it is your belief that men should attend baby showers.


Signed,
What’s Going On?

Dear What:
Many modern women believe that a baby shower is just like any other party with plenty of food, party games and adult beverages. Of course the mother to be doesn’t drink, but the bar is open for other attendees.  It has been reported to me that “the guys have a great time, in fact, they were into the games more than the ladies.” I’m told that the men typically buy a pack of diapers, as it eliminates their gift-giving anxiety and they know their gift will be used!

Coed or ‘cigar’ showers allow the father of the baby and his friends to welcome the expected baby too. These women say “hey, without his help fertilizing her ovum, there would be no baby, so why should men be excluded?”

Well, I disagree with that new practice completely. The baby shower is the last opportunity for the focus to be on the Mom for pretty much the rest of her life, and to me there is no reason to share that spotlight with anyone. I also don’t like the showers that folks have AFTER the baby is born… when the baby is there at the shower. The new Mom is pushed into the background at an event that certainly would not have happened without her!

No, to me any father worth his salt would insist that he not come to a baby shower and instead go hang out at a sports bar, a gym, playing basketball or something like that with his buddies while the shower is taking place.  He should kiss and hug the expectant mother, tell her to enjoy her day being treated like a Queen, then he should hit the door. He should enjoy male bonding time doing something men do like to do anyway without calling it a “cigar” shower.  So no, in my opinion men should be at a baby shower.

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MsHeartBeat

Relationship and dating advice columnist of Ask HeartBeat! Has enjoyed dishing out insightful yet hilariously funny advice, tersely worded reality checks and "let me slap you upside the head" wake up calls to men and women around the globe since 1991.

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About the Author:

Relationship and dating advice columnist of Ask HeartBeat! Has enjoyed dishing out insightful yet hilariously funny advice, tersely worded reality checks and "let me slap you upside the head" wake up calls to men and women around the globe since 1991.

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